Angel's Breath

At the present moment I have two loads of laundry that need folded & put away. Another two loads to be washed. A dishwasher in need of emptying so that it can be refilled, a family room that needs to be uncluttered and vacuumed. A small photo album I'm putting together for B as a Mother's Day gift that needs finished. An appraisal request that needs followed up on. Dry cleaning that needs picked up. Two beds that need made. Four thank you cards to be written. A construction loan package with a one time close modifcation that needs put together. And somehow I have to come up with something to throw together for dinner.

In addition to the stuff I need to get done, I wanted to go to the gym today and to catch up on some back emails, start reorganizing my home office to make it more like a workplace and less like the cluttered "catch-all" room it has become and go through my closets and get rid of some stuff since summer finally seems to be on the way (knock on wood.)

Instead I didn't do any of those things. When I fed Gideon this afternoon (after he puked and I changed his shirt) I decided to hold him for a few minutes, instead of sticking him in his swing or bouncy seat right away. He snuggled in close to me and tucked his head right underneath my chin as he so often does. Pretty soon he was asleep and snoring. (It's so cute. It sounds like a baby cat purring.) And somehow I didn't have the heart to put him down and get started on my to do list. Feeling his breath on my neck, holding him close and feeling the gentle rise and fall of his tiny body just took my breath away. What a miracle our bodies are. What a miracle this brand new little life is.

Now maybe I'm crazy and overly emotional because there was no big event, and no big revelation today. I didn't learn anything I didn't already know. But somehow I found myself moved to tears by the miracle I was holding in my arms. It was almost like I was mesmerized and unable to move because I was just so caught up in how glorious his breathing was. (Is it weird that after more than a month little things like this still catch me off guard? Never mind, don't answer that. I think I already know it's weird.)

So I didn't move. Instead I turned on the TV very quietly. More for background noise than anything. How appropriate that the Travel Channel was doing a special on "Earth's natural wonders." As I contemplated the miracles that allow this little body to live and breathe, I got to see Niagra Falls and the Amazon and the Grand Canyon and Mt. Everest and was even more overwhelmed at how special we must be to our Heavenly Father. Of all of the awe-inspiring and amazing things in creation somehow He still found time to create this beautiful little boy. And trusted him to us, body and spirit.

So today I didn't do anything productive. I just sat there and enjoyed the gentle breathing of an angel.